The Musings of K.E. Bonner
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. |
2/21/2023 0 Comments Best Life Advice/Writing AdvicePreop is a hive of activity at 6:45am. Metal charts clink, heart monitors beep, and a mingled aroma of betadine, hand sanitizer, and rubbing alcohol wafts through the air. Nurses, aides, mid-levels, and doctors side-step one another as they check orders, see patients, and sign consents.
“Hi, I’m Karen, and I’ll be your anesthetist this morning,” I say as I enter the preop bay. An elderly man is lying on a stretcher. He answers my questions and I turn back to the chart to double check his paperwork. “Young lady,” he rasps, and reaches out his liver-spotted hand out. I take it. Wrinkles crisscross his face like a cracked desert landscape. “I need to tell you something.” After a long career in healthcare, I’ve learned to listen to my patients. Our eyes lock and he squeezes my hand. “You will never be able to accomplish everything that you want to accomplish without a life of sobriety.” An impulse flickered between us, an undeniable shared action potential. “Okay,” I nod, taken aback. Why would he say this to me? Did I look like a heavy drinker? His matter-of-fact way of speaking stayed with me. There was no possible way that this man knew that I was struggling to accomplish my goals. At that point I’d been writing, editing, and re-writing my first novel, not to mention that I was working long shifts at the hospital, raising two young children, and struggling to keep my marriage and our finances together. I wasn’t a heavy drinker, a few glasses of wine over dinner to unwind after a long day. What did he see in me that compelled him to speak his truth? I chewed on his words but wasn’t ready to quit drinking, yet. One Sunday morning I lay in bed with a large bottle of Gator-aide praying for the nausea and pounding headache to recede. It was my day to write, and I could barely lift my head from the pillow. This hangover is a waste of my time, I fumed. I thought about my adoptive mother, and how she steadily drank herself into dementia. I spent most of that day on the couch lamenting the loss of the most precious thing that I possessed: time. I couldn’t write while I was drinking, and my hangover rendered me completely useless. This was the beginning of me developing a distaste for alcohol. Clarity followed sobriety. My energy skyrocketed, I was writing more consistently, and better. I reasoned that I’d unknowingly been in a constant state of dehydration. My scale started a downward trend as I began to exercise, which increased oxygenation to my brain, and increased my energy even more. I began to see how much time I had wasted by drinking, and to understand that I had been self-medicating with wine. Most people are not ready to hear my patient’s words, and in truth, it took me ten years to process and act on them. These days I drink half a glass of wine on special occasions, but I write every day. Time is precious and limited, make every effort to use your to the fullest.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorK.E. Bonner is the author of Witching Moon, coming from Belle Isle Books in fall/winter 2020. Archives
February 2023
CategoriesAll Blogger Book Blogger Magical Realism Publishing Writing Writing Blog Writing Craft |